This week has been extra challenging for me in many ways. And yet, every picture I’ve posted on Instagram included a smile and that living-the-life attitude.
Marc has been out of town for work since Sunday and both of us will readily admit, we don’t function quite as well without the other. No one is more surprised by this than me since I spent so many years on my own never believing I needed a man.
But there is a big difference between needing and wanting. The support I receive from Marc is unmatched, and honestly, something I never thought I’d be fortunate enough to experience.
I was reminded of that this week when suddenly I had a family health scare and Marc was 3,000 miles away.
It was nine weeks ago today Marc and I said our “I dos” on a beautiful beach in Mexico. But just two weeks into married life we were faced with a frightening health diagnosis in Marc’s immediate family, and less than two months later the same has happened to mine.
I won’t go into details in order to protect everyone’s privacy, but I will say these last few weeks have forced me to take a realistic look at life and all the things—and people—I have to be thankful for. I am reminded that life rarely goes the way you would expect, and even more rarely provides a reason why.
Since hearing the news in my family this week I haven’t posted anything on this blog and very little on Instagram and social media. It wasn’t that I needed a break, but rather I couldn’t handle the idea of making it look like everything was just fine when in reality I am sad and frightened of what the future may hold
In many ways this week has brought me back to my single days, though instead of a sweet and cuddly cat named Madison I have a sweet and cuddly labradoodle named Oxford. I must say, Madison was a bit better in the comforting department. Oxford still spends a lot of time barking at animals on TV and chasing his own tail, neither of which help me all that much. But he’s cute so I’ll keep him!
I am always incredibly hard on myself but after this week I have a little more respect for everything I went through before finding Marc and how well I coped. Being single is hard! Being alone is really hard! Somehow, I did it for years and I know many of you are doing it as well.
Now I at least know Marc is coming home today, but back then I didn’t even know Marc existed. And yet I got through every day and each of the challenges included.
I know I could do it again, but I don’t want to. And fortunately, I don’t have to.
Our families will get through all of this, no matter what happens. And while I get back to posting happy pictures on social media I promise to keep things real as much as possible and whenever possible.
Because just using this space to tell you a sweater is on sale for 50% off, no matter how soft and cozy or how many colors it’s available in or that it’s just been restocked, doesn't change the fact that it's still only a sweater. It’s not going to change your life. Unless it’s cashmere. Maybe then…
Just know that whatever you may be going through in your life, you’re not alone. For every perfectly curated photo you see on Instagram there are far more challenges, struggles and doubts to go along with it.
Social media life isn’t real life. But we do our best to keep smiling in both.
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